Bacjen Pastox - Sent In By Toxie

Toxie's Bacjen Pastox

Ingredients:

Pasta
Bacon
Cheese (cheddar is good, and a bit of parmesan is nice)
One tin of chopped tomatoes
A squooge of tomato puree
One onion
Lots of garlic (or garlic to taste)
A splash of worcestershire sauce
A sprinkle of oregano
Some Olive Oil

Method:

First, chop the onion and garlic and fry them in the oil until soft. Add the chopped tomatoes, oregano, worcestershire sauce and tomato puree and simmer until everything else is ready.
Chop the bacon into bite sized lumps, spread out on a baking sheet and bake until crispy.
Meanwhile, boil your pasta.
Once pasta is cooked and bacon is cripy mix them together along with the tomato mixture.
Grate a mass of cheese on top and grill until crispy.

Voila!

ImNotRightBotheredMe's Veggie Pasta Sauce

ImNotRightBotheredMe's Veggie Pasta Sauce

This sauce is good for pasta, making bolognese, meatballs & spaghetti.

Ingredients:

2 tins chopped tomatoes
2 courgettes
2 large carrots
1 half red pepper
1 half green pepper
1 red onion
Garlic
Olive oil
Mixed Italian herbs

Method:

Chop onions & fry with garlic in olive oil, add herbs.
Dice all the remaining veg (the smaller the better) & add to pan, fry gently for 5-10 minutes.
Add chopped tomatoes, pinch of sugar, season.
Simmer for ages.
Serve as is, or if you're disguising it for kids (and mardy blokes), blitz it with a hand blender.

ImNotRightBotheredMe's Quick & Sexy Italian

ImNotRightBotheredMe's Quick & Sexy Italian

Ingredients:

1 chopped red onion
Garlic (to taste)
Olive oil
Finely chopped salami
Passata
Pasta
Lots of black pepper

Method:

Cook pasta in plenty of salted boiling water until done
Fry onions & garlic in olive oil (whilst pasta cooks).
When onions and garlic has softend, add chopped salami & fry gently for around a minute
Add the passata, and the cooked pasta. Stir well.
Add LOADS of freshly ground pepper.

Fucking EAT

Lazy Bastard Pasta - Sent In By I'mNotRightBotheredMe

I'mNotRightBotheredMe's Lazy Bastard Pasta

Ingredients:

Pasta
1 carton passata with garlic & basil
Creme fraiche

Method:

Cook pasta in plenty of salty boiling water. When cooked so the pasta still has some 'bite' to it (al dente), drain and put pasta back into the warm saucepan.

Add passata & heat through gently. When almost ready to serve, add a dollop of creme fraiche. It is so very lazy, but really quite delicious.

Spicy Beef & Sausage Bolongnacurry - Sent In By Shegetz

SPICY BEEF AND SAUSAGE BOLOGNACURRY

Description:
A curious mix of Italian and Indian sauces with an awful lot of spices. It takes quite a bit of effort to prepare, but it's very much worth it, and it's very hard to finish in one sitting with 2-3 people due to the sheer amount of food it produces. Probably not good for anything other than a very big dinner with a lot of sitting down afterwards, and not recommended for anyone who can't handle their spicy food.

Feeds: 3-4, or 2-3 if you're feeling extra peckish.

Ingredients:
- 1x Tin of chopped tomatoes.
- 1x Long spurt of tomato puree.
- 4x tsp. Sharwood's Madras Curry Powder
- A few splashes of chilli sauce (I recommend Encona Hot Pepper Sauce)
(Or you can replace the above with a jar of a Ragu sauce of your choice and a few spoons of Patak's Madras Sauce).
- 1x pack of good quality beef mince
- 3x sausages of your choice (Sicillian ones are lovely)
- 1x Jar (200g) of sliced jalapeno peppers (don't worry, you won't be using them all)
- 3x Large closed-cup mushrooms.
- 0.5x Pepper (Red works best).
- 0.5x One spanish onion.
- 1x h/tbsp. Mediterranean Herbs.
- 1x h/tbsp. Crushed chillis.
-Garlic (crushed or fresh) to taste.
- Enough spaghetti per person.
- Pesto if you've got any.

Preparation:

- Take a frying pan and one saucepan, deposit the sausages into the frying pan with some oil and put the mince in the frying pan with the same, on a medium heat. Use the time it takes for the mince to cook through, breaking it up occasionally, to chop the onion, pepper, mushrooms and, if you're using it, fresh garlic.

- Once the mince is almost done, take the sausages out of the frying pan (don't worry if they're not quite done, they're going back into the heat anyway) and chop them into sections about a centimetre long and mix them in with the vegetables you just chopped - put this whole mixture in with the mince and stir it in, don't add the chillis yet as it ruins their flavour if they're cooked too much.

- If you're going the chopped-tomatoes route, open the tin of chopped tomatoes and drain the surface water off. Pour these into your (hopefully quite large by this point) saucepan and mix them in thoroughly, with the spurt of puree, curry powder and chilli sauce. Mix it all up thoroughly and hopefully it will be smelling very nice with a good amount of sauce in now. If you're going the prepared-sauce route (it's easier, trust me) now is the time to add it all - keep adding the Madras sauce until it smells and looks delicious.

- Now is the time to add the crushed chillis, herbs and - if you want it - crushed garlic. Also, if you've got some Pesto to use, add a couple of teaspoonfuls to the mix. Stir again and then add the jalapenos and mix them up as well. This part is basically complete now, we're going to let it reduce for a few minutes while we do the quick-cook spaghetti, so turn the heat down to a simmer and let the flavours mix.

- Spaghetti, boiling water, five minutes. The easy part, just poke at it with a spoon every now and then to avoid it coming out as one stringy lump, drain and divide up on the plates. By this point the tomatoey abomination in the saucepan will have blended nicely, so it's time to start serving that up. It should have a lot of spice but not enough to completely mask the tomatoey undertones and, depending on your taste for curry, will be anywhere from a dark oaky brown to a vivid red. Using Korma sauce instead of madras sauce will yield a bright orange, creamier flavour that's quite nice as well.